Honest Government Ad: We Make Everything Good Sh!t – Australia science agencies “infiltrated and hollowed” out by fossil fuel industry
2 July 2021 (The Juice Media) – Hello, I’m from the Australien government. In today’s episode of “We Make Everythig Good Shit”, we look at the CSIRO, your trusted science agency, which has earned a reputation for great inventions: wifi, space stuff, Aeroguard. Unlike gas companies, which have earned a reputation for poisoning aquifers, ripping you off with high bills, and paying no fucking tax.
So we thought, “Hey, what if we could let those gas companies use the CSIRO brand to regain your trust and keep making the ching-ching?”
Introducing GISERA. GISERA is an alliance between your beloved CSIRO and the five biggest companies in Australia’s fracking industry. It’s a great setup: they provide the money, and the CSIRO provides the logo.
Those gas companies are very modest, so whenever GISERA publishes its research, they give CSIRO all the credit. Of course, CSIRO scientists care very deeply about their integrity. But don’t worry, GISERA fixed that problem by putting gas executives on all the committees overseeing its research. And just to be sure, we also cut hundreds of CSIRO climate scientists’ jobs and made the rest fear for their jobs if they speak out.
GISERA has made some terrific findings, like that time they said this river being on fire is totes normal and has nothing to do with the thousands of fracking wells all around it. […]
And that’s how we’ve been letting your trusted science agency be infiltrated and hollowed out by these Earth-fucking tumors.
But don’t worry, you still have your trusted Bureau of Meteorology.
Hello, I’m from the BoM, and today’s forecast is brought to you by our sponsors, who gave us millions to not mention climate change. [more]
