Texas Governor Rick Perry fires a pistol in the air. wonkette.comBy Wonkette Jr.
9 June 2011 Texas Governor Rick Perry has declared he can’t solve the state’s problems, so from now on official government policy is “pray, everybody.” Perry is holding a day of fasting and prayer called “The Response” at a sports stadium in Houston on August 6th, which everyone can now consider the “effective date” for God’s taking over of Texas affairs. “Some problems are beyond our power to solve,” Perry said, which includes the state debt, unemployment, public health, disaster response, and, uh, teen pregnancy. Prayer will now be in charge of these things. If anyone has a problem with how these things are going, they can phone God and ask “what the hell,” because Rick Perry will no longer be responsible. From “The Response” website:

Right now, America is in crisis: we have been besieged by financial debt, terrorism, and a multitude of natural disasters. As a nation, we must come together and call upon Jesus to guide us through unprecedented struggles, and thank Him for the blessings of freedom we so richly enjoy. Some problems are beyond our power to solve, and according to the Book of Joel, Chapter 2, this historic hour demands a historic response. Therefore, on August 6, thousands will gather to pray for a historic breakthrough for our country and a renewed sense of moral purpose.

This “breakthrough” sounds even better than that whole “Rapture” thing. What date can we expect this “breakthrough,” Rick? August 10th or so?

Rick Perry Resigns Control Of Texas: God In Charge As of August 6